Dr Jane Greer on Janay Rice and Is Love Blind

Dr Jane Greer on Janay Rice and Is Love Blind

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Janay Rice, wife of disgraced NFL player Ray Rice, says she refuses to be stuck in that elevator. In a recent interview with Matt Lauer on Today she talked about the domestic abuse incident that seems to have taken over her life lately. Specifically, Janay spoke about the two now infamous security tapes which show Ray beating her in a casino elevator. She admitted that she did not see either video before they were made public, and still refuses to watch the second, more graphic tape because she is not going to allow “the public [to] bring me back there.” In addition, during a press conference this past spring, Janay surprised people when she apologized for her “role” in the fight. At the time she said, “I was ready to do anything that was going to help the situation. Help his image. Help obviously his career.”

It’s a given that physical and verbal abuse do not belong in a relationship, yet we see over and over again that people experience it and decide to live with it. From the outside looking in, it is hard to fathom why anyone would stay in a partnership with someone who would hurt them. In the Today interview, Janay also said when talking about what happened, “That’s not him, that’s not us.” The way we see the person and how their partner sees them, in this case, how we view Ray from the outside and the way Janay sees him, are often two completely different pictures. The public focuses on the bad behavior because that is its only point of reference. However, the other person in the relationship knows their partner on other levels, many of which can be loving and caring, so even though they know the behavior they experienced is destructive, they are able to excuse it. They are blinded by love, which is otherwise known as denial…

Read more of this article by Dr Jane Greer on Psychology Today Here>>

Article by Dr Jane Greer

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