Who Should You Be on Your First Date

Dating begins with the presentation of “who we are.” Are you showing up as the “real you?” or are you presenting a different version of yourself in the hopes of impressing another?

First dates provide an opportunity to create an impression by putting one’s best foot forward. It’s tempting terrain for pretending to be something we’re not, but doing so can eventually hurt both parties.

In pretending to be something we are not, we fool the other into buying into a product that’s clearly not for sale. We lure them into what we think they want, or who we’d like to be, but are not. There’s no future relationship possible from this context, only games, falseness and failure.

The extremes to which some people feel compelled to amend their personalities and attitudes to get love, is alarming. When the need to be wanted overtakes the need to be who we are, failure will follow. It’s imperative to honor ourselves in order to love another.

Continue reading →